I was just going through my wardrobe and I found a bunch of stuff I’ve kept from my first ‘love’. There was a Valentines card he made me, a birthday card for my 16th birthday and a really big, gorgeous painting he did of me and him for that birthday. How lovely :)
when you get to the weight you want will you continue to stick to your strict(?) diet and going to the gym or will you be a bit more relaxed? :)
I’ll continue to stick to it. I just think you can always improve hings so there’s no point stopping when you’re so near perfection. I do know that’s really bad though, especially when it’s about things like losing weight
I cried in front of customers at work yesterday! There was so much going on, it was really strange. I refused to serve one of the Old Boys at the end of the bar because he was waaaay too drunk, he couldn’t even hold his pint let alone defend his right to be served. The other boys were really unhappy with that because it was an ‘insult’ to them but fuck off if I am going to lose my job over it, no way. One of them ended up sneaking him a drink so I ended up having to refuse to serve them all - I didn’t want to but they were all being dicks last night so I was pissed off enough to make sure they weren’t served. Anyway, it was nearing 11 so I was calming down because I knew we only had about half an hour left when I heard “FUCKING BAR ME THEN!” which one of the men had shouted at me. I was fuming, I stormed round the bar and stood on his side (which I have been told was very silly :() and said to him that he could finish his pint but he was going to be barred for further notice to which he replied “Okay.. Baby.” He is disgusting. I said to him “Do not ever call me baby.” and walked back around to my side of the bar. I was talking to my manager about it when I heard a massive smash and a “FUCK YOU”. I turned around and he’d thrown his pint in my direction but it missed and smashed a £50 bottle of gin and a bottle of Disaronno. Everyone in the pub ran to the bar and customers were screaming about how they should have ran after him and asking if I was ok. I didn’t see it but by everyone’s reactions I assume it was really close to me. My manager got onto the police and I had to run out the back because I could feel myself begin to cry. I was a bit shaken up but after a fag I felt better and went back to work. The police managed to find him though and he was nicked and put in a cell for the night. He was done with attempted criminal damage or something and he’s going to pay for a new bottle of Hendrick’s and Disaronno. The Old Boys were, of course, defending what he did which meant the younger people at the bar were battling it out with them so the argument went on all night. The police came later to take statements from my manager and I didn’t get home until 2.30. It was a very long night.
I had a consultation with Transform today about getting a boob job, and as I was in the waiting room a surgeon from TV walked in - he’s definitely been in the Channel 4 programmes (the good ones) so that must be a good sign ;)
Western culture has become a bit of a monster. The media feeds society what it wants to be fed. Individuals decide what it is that society wants to hear. We are those individuals that make up ‘society’ and we are to blame for the monster we have created
I’ve got to make my way to Bond Street tomorrow. on my own! This is scary for me because I’ve rarely got a train to London with somebody else let alone by myself. I’ve got to be there at 10 and even though Google Maps said it wouldn’t take longer than 1 hour and 15 minutes I’m going to leave at 8 just in case. If I get there early I can stop in a coffee shop and get a drink and read my book and feel really proper. Maybe I’ll see a man in there and our eyes will meet over our coffees and he’ll come over and say “hi, what’s that you’re reading?” and I’ll tell him and he’ll get me another drink and sit down and offer to keep me company while he reads too and we can sit in silence and then I’ll make my excuses to leave but I’ll happen to bump into him again on my way back to the station when I have to go home and he walks me to the train and says he’ll see me again and that is the story we’ll tell at our wedding.
Living has become a competition and if people aren’t winners then they’re losers. There’s no in between, and the losers end up settling for things that they shouldn’t be settling for and doing things that don’t make them happy. I think it’s sad that people feel they need to settle. No one should settle.
“Those who find ugly meanings in beautiful things are corrupt without being charming. This is a fault. Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the cultivated. For these there is hope. They are the elect to whom beautiful things mean only Beauty. There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written, or badly written. That is all.”—Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray (via labigmouthstrikesagain)
I kind of want a boyfriend without sex for a while so I am going to start going to church, possibly in Chislehurst or up London, to find myself a good looking Christian male keeping his virginity locked away for years to come. Good plan Batman.
Had a 3rd date with Osama on Monday and it went well. We met at his house and we kissed a bit then he took me to the cinema and afterwards we went back to his house again. We were in bed for about 20 minutes and we ‘tashed on’ ;) but I wasn’t really feeling it because I was so hungry so I told him I had to go home. I wasn’t abrupt or anything though because I had given him warning and we stayed in bed for a bit before I got up got my stuff together. It was like as soon as we got out of his room it got a bit weird and awkward and he gave me a kiss on the cheek at his front door - he didn’t even walk me to my car. He said “text me” as I left but I haven’t and he hasn’t text me either. He might have been expecting me to go by the ‘Three Date Rule’ so maybe he was a bit disappointed that we didn’t get up to the naughties. Not really sure what’s going on but I’ve lost my fancy for him anyway, now that is seems to have fizzled out already!
I'm sorry to bother you. I can't talk to anyone else right now and need advice. You always give good advice. Earlier today was a brilliant day. Me and my boyfriend had a laugh and a chat and were enjoying his birthday. On our walk back from school, we passed my rapist. He glared at me. Now I feel like my world is falling apart, silly as it is. I have no idea what to do. It's like I can never be truly happy, because he's always looming over me. And I'm so frightened and lost. Help? Please? :(
Is this true? This is horrible if it is. You need to turn him in if he’s done that to you, it’s the only way you’re going to get closure. Tell your boyfriend if you trust him and tell the police. You do not deserve to be living in constant fear, nobody does. Don’t let your life be ruined by somebody else, it isn’t fair. You deserve better :) x
Every time I see this post I doubt humanity a little bit. It’s like saying “reblog if the sky is blue” or “reblog if grass is usually green, unless it’s gone shitty and dry and is a little bit brown.” Everybody wishes cancer didn’t exist, it goes without saying. When you meet someone, you can automatically assume that they wish cancer doesn’t exist. I know it’s nice to show your support for sufferers etc. I just think you could say something a bit more meaningful than re-blogging a stupid post like that. /rant.
How the Hell does calling me ‘beautiful’ and using lines like “well, I like blonde girls with blue eyes so uno, that’s my type ;)” somehow give you reason to think I should give you my number? This boy is such a dick. I’ve met him at a few parties, he told me the boyfriend I was with at the time looked like a gay prick and I shouldn’t be with him, and also told me that his music career was going so well but he really didn’t like getting SOO much attention from all the girls around him. POOR BOY. He poses with his top off and sunglasses on in so many pictures on facebook it’s just wrong. Then he calls me a geek for not giving out my number because I “know him” and he’s not “some creep that’s going to keep pestering me”. Jog on son! He’s not even fit.
Yes, lots. I have to eat with certain cutlery. I have my carbs separate from other foods. No meat other than occasional chicken and tuna. No ‘real’ food after breakfast other than dinner. I make food as hot as possible to it lasts longer. No oil/butter/cheese ever. There’s lots more but I can’t think haha.
35. Say 3 facts about your personality
I’m defensive lol
36. Has somebody ever spread a nasty rumour about you? YES! I found out a year after it had been spread though, it was going around the year above so I didn’t hear it when it went round. An older boy owed me £2 and said “I’ll buy you some mayfair instead init” so I was like yeah cooooooooool heheh older boy talking to me! Then he told people “Emily backed me head for a fag”. In year 8 a girl also told everyone I masturbated in my bath….